The Metal People

\m/
Yes. I am a metal head. I listen to every "grotesque" band you so very detest. I revel in the music that can make you spill your guts. Yes. I am a metal head.

But let me point out, I am not the metal head you will picture me as - tattooed, high, pierced, bad ass. Those metal heads you see are just one of us. My initiation into the heavier from of music was quite early. When kids in my class were still listening to Gupt, I had was listening to my first alternative rock band - Limp Bizkit 3 Dollar Bill.

The differentiation between the various heavy genres at times is very vague. Though alternative rock (NuRock) is totally different from alternative metal. Goth, melo, death, core, doom, technical, progressive, funk, etc etc; metal has lots of sub genres.

But basically the people listening to them are the same, though some may prefer one sub genre over others.

So, here is my classification:

1. The Moshers
These are the "niggers". Those rowdy fucktards who are here to make an impression by emulating the retards from Ursa Minor.
If you don't have a clue what mosher/moshing is about, check here and here.
These are the most hated, yet most entertaining of the lot. Sometimes when the on stage action is lacking, these are the dudes who provide the comic relief. It's amusing to see them piss their own pants and brag about it. Give it up for, Moshers!

2. Headbangers
These were born with a purpose. To bang their heads. That's it. No complications. Have music, will bang head. Usually they come with semi long and long hair, which are usually tied at the beginning of a concert. But at some point during the duration of the musical exercise (this point varies for each person), in logo pe mata aa jati hai. They would, all of a sudden, release the rubber band, and pow. Off they go. Some lazy ass would remain at their places. But the ardent headbangers will actually walk up to the speakers and bang in front of it. As if the speakers will really appreciate it. But please note, these are the hardcore fans. Say anything demeaning about metal, and they will be on you like shit on Velcro, "Shut the fuck up you bitch! No one says that about Shavo!". Touche.

3. Connoisseur
This is the band to which I belong. We are subtle in our expression for our love for metal. We can be spotted standing right behind the moshers, with one arm crossed and the other on the chin, moving our head slightly with the music. Occasionally, some of us might choose to head bang as well. We are the biggest critics as well. "Dude, the drummers sucks so much, even I could do a better job", "Where the fuck did they find this retarded vocalist", "Did you hear the riffs on that one?? SUCKED", "And I was thinking Bhayanak Maut was to play tonight, these bands suck", etc etc. One more interesting point is here, this lot also has the drifters. People, who usually listen to pop music (Britney, Enrique et al), but end up at a rock/metal concert (somehow many think it's cool), and act as if they have a Ph.D. in death (I know a few who actually read wikipedia before going to a concert). But anyways, rock on brothers and their sisters! \m/

4. Wankers
These are those bunch of ass wipes who are just to check the metal chicks out (whatever few are there). These are easy to spot. Their musical gyroscope has orientation problems which hampers them in locating the stage. They end up with their back towards the stage, facing the crowd. Also, some of them are dressed in club wear, so they end up looking like gays in that crowd. Good amusing lot though.

There are several other minority groups (like the band groupies, those who want to become groupies, the ex-groupies, the people who had nothing else to do, etc.). But these are the four major IMHO. If you don't concur, go back to listening to Britney.