Forever Never

I have been lying to myself till now but now I know. I am never going to see you again or even get to talk to you again. And yet, I can't stop obsessing about you. How many years has it been now? Longer than the time we actually were with each other. I comb the internet looking for tidbits about you. How creepy! But I don't care. I have no pride. I read over and over again , the words you wrote to me. In my mind, I can hear your voice, sometimes angry, sometimes sad, sometimes singing, sometimes glad...

You don't want to hear from me. You told me that last year when I wanted to talk to you. And I know we can't have anything between us now. No way. I know. But still...Still...